The most important thing to know about growth
This article addresses one of the core tenets of Rebellious Leadership for women. Over three months, my flagship program brings a group of women together to step into this paradigm so they can feel more freedom and regain agency over their own experience.
Rebellious Leader core tenet: A Rebellious Leader understands that growth is iterative. She trusts herself in all seasons.
Have you ever found yourself thinking “how am I here again?” You might have made the same mistake again. Or re-learned a lesson you've already learned. Or attempted to solve something in a way that's never worked for you. That’s the nature of growth.
There’s a fantasy that something can shake you so deeply that you make a 180 degree turn in an instant. While some events or experiences can dramatically shift you, those shifts don't stick. You’ll still experience moments where an older version of you is present again.
Integrating the parts of yourself that you are growing into takes time. Initially you may find the version of yourself you're growing into available 10% of the time. With intention, that percentage increases. Until the version of yourself you’ve grown into is present and available more often than not. Eventually, the older version of yourself is rarely present.
The challenge with the slow pace of growth
The challenge with being in the slow path of growth is to stick with it. Even when it feels less available. And to be gentle with yourself throughout the agonizingly slow pace of change. When you find yourself thinking “how I am here again,” consider instead “of course I am here again.” Shifting your perspective frees you from the devastation that can arise throughout change.
The opportunity to embrace the cyclical nature of change
After you shift away from needing linear growth, you gain access to seasonal growth. You'll have periods in life when 180 degree leaps occur. And periods that call for slowing down for integration.
A Rebellious Leader aligns herself with the energy of the season. This alignment requires making choices that honor her season of life. And resisting the pull of the other seasons. She develops an ability to attune to the change of the seasons. And adjust her efforts and focus accordingly. She begins to appreciate the gift of each season and trusts herself to move with the change of seasons. She believes that a full life includes all seasons.
The four seasons of growth
Nature offers a brilliant view into seasons you can use to orient your own growth around.
Spring is a season of new beginnings where new learnings and skills emerge. This is the season marked by novelty and freshness. You feel like you are experiencing things for the first time. The energy here is one of action and seizing new opportunities and viewpoints.
Summer is a season of abundance and activity. The foundation is set and the challenge is one of steadiness. You are beginning to see the results of your efforts, but distractions abound. Questions of commitment arise. The energy here is one of care, commitment, and persistence.
Fall is a season of revealing. The result is either a bounty from your persistent effort or reckoning with failures. Or unfavorable results. This season can be about celebration or disappointment. The energy here is one of acceptance and sense-making.
Winter is a season of rest and re-evaluation. If results from the Fall are favorable, you recuperate and renew your spirit. If you’re coming off disappointment, you must decide what to trim away or let die. In service of making way for new beginnings. The energy here is slow, intentional, and preparatory.
Call for reflection:
What season are you in? What would it look like to trust yourself in that season?
Shine On,
Alicia
(Image Dustin Humes by via Unsplash)